Sunday, December 21, 2008

Adventure returns to my life

The day: Tuesday, the day of my last final, the day that would end in happiness and freedom...or so I thought. Little did I know, tragedy, heartbreak, misery and woe (yes both misery and woe) were in store. Here's the tale.

I know what you're thinking. I missed my true calling in life as a graphic design type of person. And you're probably right, I mean, just when you think a logo can't get better, I add lightning bolts.

So, Tuesday started the same as any other Tuesday, except that I had a final (this changed the day quite a bit, so essentially it started different from all other Tuesdays). I got up, studied, and went and took the test. It was painful, but pain is my middle name. Not a day in my life passes that I don't regret that my parents named me Michael Pain McMurtrey. Afterwards, did some adventerous stuff for a while, and left to wait for the bus around 8:40. I take the city bus to school, so as to save the environment. Not because I am too lazy to go and buy a parking pass.

This is Captain Planet. We have a lot in common. He's saves the world by fighting polluting super villains. I save the world by taking public transportation.

While waiting for the bus, two classmates drove up and offered me a ride home. I accepted. Carpooling is also on the list of ways I save the environment. If not for me, this world probably would have been destroyed years ago. I was being dropped off second. After we got to the first guy's apartment, I moved to the front, rather than continue awkwardly sitting in the back. We continued on. We got to my place, and I went to my apartment. Chalk me up for another success at finding my way home at the end of the day. Then it happened. I felt lighter than usual. I did a quick check. I hadn't lost weight due to some sort of miracle diet. I emptied my pockets. Sure enough, I lost my cell phone. I checked the apartment. No luck. I checked my friend's car. Failure and frustration resulted. Did I leave it at my desk on campus? I thought not. But thinking isn't always my strong point, so I decided to ignore what I thought, and go check.

Well...this picture speaks for itself, thus making the caption pointless...

I grabbed my car keys and left. Roads were treacherous. Snow, ice, slush, salt, dirt, and loose gravel were everywhere. I didn't care though. I had lost my phone. I sped around corners like a grandma in the Grand Prix. I got to the building I work/study in. I realized I had emptied out my pockets, meaning I didn't have my keys which would get me into the building. I silently cursed in my mind with words like "Man" and "Yar, this sucks". Several door attempts later, I managed to secure a cell phone off of another poor soul trying to get into the locked building. I called a student in my research group that I knew was still there. She let me in. I checked. No phone. I left very dejectedly. I, of course, didn't care about a worldly thing like a cell phone, given that I am much above that sort of thing. However, the fact that I had lost something, that I had failed to protect something in my care, and that I was unable to be successful despite my best effort...that's what really hurt. Well...and the fact that it's hard to talk to anyone I know when I don't have a cell phone...that kind of hurt too. But it was like being stung by a bee while falling into a pit full of boiling lava and failure.
This is what it's like to try and not succeed. Imagine what it's like to jump in there. Best never to try if you're just going to fail.

I decided it must have fallen out of my pocket. Either when I was getting in the car, or when I moved to the front of the car. I searched through the feet (feet should be read as inches here) of snow where I had gotten in my friend's car. No luck. My coworker who had let me into the building saw me and offered to call my phone for me. We went to the parking lot where I had switched places in my friend's car. It took about 3 wrong turns, and 4 checked parking lots before we found the right one. I looked in the snow and saw it. My poor frozen phone, covered in ice and snow, yet still alive, if just barely. I quickly cleaned him off, warmed him by the fire, and got him a steaming cup of hot chocolate. All's well that ends well...except the hours of frustration, cold and humiliation...

7 comments:

Brady said...

Alls well that ends well. At least you got to take your cell phone to a nice warm place afterwards.

Elizabeth Downie said...

Hahaha, once again I am cracking up at your blog post. I hope your cell phone enjoyed the hot chocolate! That was sweet of you to take care of it in that way. I also really enjoyed this line: "Not a day in my life passes that I don't regret that my parents named me Michael Pain McMurtrey"

You crack me up!

Katherine said...

Oh, that poor phone! Lost and dejected! Are you sure that chart wasn't meant for your phone - the number of times he's been left out in the cold? Tell him (your phone) that I say Merry Christmas!

Stephanie said...

Proof that hot chocolate really is the only/best medicine. And, for the record, failure is bad...but failure in a pit of hot lava?! That's intense.

***This comment should prove that I actually read some of your blog, and don't just look at the amazing graphics.

Kip and Katie said...

Yarr, that sucked then unsucked.

Nathan S said...

Mike,

My in-laws have spent the last 2 hours reading Christmas make-me-cry stories but yours takes the cake!

thedannycrittershow said...

Not the ending I was expecting...I was hoping for the orange mutating blob to reappear...